Young Grandpa Shaky

There's something a bit humbling about waiting in line at Walgreens to get a giant 100-count bottle of capsules. They look at me like I'm picking up something for grandpa.
No, just me. Although lately I've been feeling more grandpa-like. The Gabapentin dries me out, so I want to drink a lot of water before bed to balance things out. This is, of course, a bad idea.
It's worse if I want to have some beer or wine before bed. Then I want to drink even more water so I'm not hung over. And I get to have some fun with the drug's dizzying side effects.
I've yet to reach 30, and already I can't drink caffeine in the afternoon (a cup at 2 p.m. yesterday kept me up until about 2 a.m.) and I can't drink alcohol in the evening.
I'm ready to retire.